30 Days of Erotic Truth #24: Freaky Deaky, Huh?

Task: What is your definition of freaky?

MY definition? That's easy. To me, 'freaky' is some type of unnatural occurence or something considerably out of the norm. A tree falls on your house and there's no storm for miles.... you spontaneously combust.... Donald Trump loses the toupee... THAT is freaky to me.

Anything else is just some derogatory shit folks have come to accept. People just don't get when the meanings of certain words are twisted to be a bad thing. They just poke their chests out, or giggle and go right on with it like it's some sort of badge of honor.

I'm not freaky, nor am I a freak. I prefer you not call me either. Nothing I do sexually is out of the norm or unnatural...for me. Actually, if you read and study history, you'll see that nothing ANYONE does sexually is out of the norm or unnatural. People just choose to stigmatize certain things so as to draw attention away from the fact that they're doing it too.

So no, my definition of 'freaky' may not be what you thought it would. And I'm good with that.

30 Days of Erotic Truth #23: "The REAL One"

Task: Dom/sub… sexy or just an excuse for men/women to abuse?




Oh my!



D/s is definitely a beautiful and sexy thing…when done/sharedright.



I have been involved with 2 Doms in my life. My experienceswith first one taught me to appreciate the second One, before I ever even methim.



My first Dom was not a bad guy, just one with serious issues when it came to women. To me, he feared any relationship between two women. If two women who were with him formed a friendship, and shared anything that he was not directly involved with, he would become angry and accuse them of forming a secret alliance against him. He felt he should be included in, and privy to every aspect of our lives…including our other female friends. As is a Dom's prerogative, when he became angry he would take his frustrations out on his sub sexually, but he would take them out on me mentally. He never beat either of us in the sense of wanting to do physical harm by punching, slapping, etc. With her, I watched him spank her until a deep tissue bruise formed. Once with me he penetrated me anally without benefit of mental/physical preparation or lube. He was angry. He wanted to punish me. He fucked me in my ass. However,the mental punishment to me was far worse. The mind games, the need to make us feel like we'd done him wrong when we hadn't, the constant arguing until I had headaches and gave in to his way of thinking. Eventually I had to walk away. I told myself that I would never get involved with a Dom again.



Several years later, I met my True One.



He is a Dom in every sense of the word, but in no way like my first Dom. He's loving, kind, protective, firm when needed, respectful, funny, and a very willing and patient guide. He's not in any hurry to make me His sub, and He's not into hurting me mentally. He's a gentle man, but He's no punk or push over. He only wants the best for and from me. He wants us to grow together,to experience things together, and He wants to share in my learning process. The sex between is incredible. He challenges my appetite, and gently pushes me at times to go beyond my limits…not to hurt me, but to expand my horizons and see my strengths in different ways. Anyone can see and feel the chemistry between us, even if we're just lost in conversation with each other. I've seen it jump out of pictures, lol. We always have a wonderful time together in EVERY aspect, not just D/s. there is just no denying how in tune we are with each other. Things were hard for me at first. Being a dominant person myself, it was very hard for me to give myself over to Him and let Him lead. Even with my first Dom I never really had to. And I still have my moments, but I have come to truly trust and depend on Him, and I love the freedom it gives me. Everything hasn't been smooth sailing. No relationship is, including D/s. But we weather our rough patches and are stronger for them. He always wants every experience with Him to be a memorable one, and so far they have been. The reality of our situation is that while He is a Dom, He is not my Dom and I am not His sub…as far as titles go. But I love Him with everything in me, and in my heart I am His… He IS my One. In His heart, I belong to Him.



I said all of that to say this: I have been in an abusive relationship. I know what it is to have someone hurt you physically, mentally, spiritually. Even with the not-so-great experience I had with my first Dom, I can't honestly say that D/s is just an excuse for someone to be abusive. I had some good experiences with my first Dom, and learned much about myself and people in the process. Abuse can occur in ANY relationship. People create excuses to abuse others all the time. You don't need a particular type of relationship to do it. From what I've seen and experienced, the good and the bad, that just isn't what D/s is about. I have the love of a GOOD Dom to prove it.

30 Days of Erotic Truth #22: Everybody Swing!

Task: Swinging… your thoughts



*sangin like Stokely from Mint Condition*



"Oh you send me swingin… You-send-me swannngin…Oh you send me swingiiinn!"




*ahem* To the subject at hand…



Swinging to me is… Eh… it's ok.



I've done the swing thing, sort of. I've been to swing parties,and even helped organize a party or two. Swinging can be a fun thing if done inthe right atmosphere with the right group of folks. The thing is, I'm just notthat much of an exhibitionist that I want a room full of folks sneaking glancesat me and whomever I'm getting it in with. I also have some form of Adult ADD.Too much outside stimuli and I can't focus. Who wants to go through that? notto mention the fact that I don't have to bump uglies with more than 2 peopleduring a sex session. There's nothing wrong with it. As I've said before, ifyou like it DO YOU. Swinging isn't really My bag. Now I can go to a swing eventand watch. I love a good eyegasm! I just don't HAVE to participate.



So swang on, honey! I ain't mad atcha….

30 Days of Erotic Truth #21: Da Head Banger's Ball

Task: Make a music playlist you would like to get busy to …(name of artist, title of song, why you chose it)

This one requred absolutely NO brainwork what-so-ever. It's real simple to answer this question, you see, because I created this list several months ago for a very special person. This playlist STAYS on my iPod. If you ask me why I chose these songs, I'll say it's because love...REAL LOVE...takes you thru all of the things these songs speak to.

I call it "Da Head Banger's Ball"........

✓ Sending My Love ~ Zhané
✓ Seduction~ Usher
✓ I Refuse~ Urban Mystic
✓ On Top Of Me~ Tyrese
✓ Signs Of Love Makin'~ Tyrese
✓ Tender Kisses~ Tracie Spencer
✓ Whatever You Want~ Tony! Toni! Toné!
✓ Just My Imagination~ The Temptations
✓ If I Were a Bell~ Teena Marie
✓ Portuguese Love ~ Teena Marie
✓ Ooh Wee~ Teena Marie & Kurupt
✓ Close The Door~ Teddy Pendergrass
✓ Turn off The Lights~ Teddy Pendergrass
✓ Shower Me With Your Love~ Surface
✓ Moon Blue~ Stevie Wonder
✓ Ribbon In The Sky~ Stevie Wonder
✓ Overjoyed~ Stevie Wonder
✓ Meeting in My Bedroom~ Silk
✓ Freak Me~ Silk
✓ Lose Control~ Silk
✓ From This Moment On (Pop On Tour Version)~ Shania Twain
✓ By Your Side~ Sade
✓ Cherish the Day~ Sade
✓ Can You Believe~ Robin Thicke
✓ You Dont Have To Cry~ Rene & Angela
✓ Your Smile~ René & Angela
✓ Believe~ Raheem DeVaughn
✓ Desire~ Raheem DeVaughn
✓ You~ Raheem DeVaughn
✓ Breathe~ Raheem DeVaughn
✓ Ask Yourself~ Raheem DeVaughn
✓ Your Body's Callin'~ R. Kelly
✓ I'll Never Leave~ R. Kelly
✓ Secret Garden~ Quincy Jones
✓ The Beautiful Ones~ Prince & The Revolution
✓ Condition of the Heart~ Prince & The Revolution
✓ Damn U~ Prince & the New Power Generation
✓ Insatiable~ Prince & the New Power Generation
✓ Slow Love~ Prince
✓ Adore~ Prince
✓ Joy in Repetition~ Prince
✓ The Question of U~ Prince
✓ Shhh~ Prince
✓ Scandalous~ Prince
✓ Meet Me On the Moon~ Phyllis Hyman
✓ The Answer Is You~ Phyllis Hyman
✓ I Don't Want to Lose You~ Phyllis Hyman
✓ Tonight I Celebrate My Love~ Peabo Bryson & Roberta Flack
✓ Can You Stop The Rain~ Peabo Bryson
✓ How Do You Keep The Music Playing~ Patti Austin & James Ingram
✓ I've Been Loving You Too Long~ Otis Redding
✓ Stairway To Heaven~ The O'Jays
✓ Let Me Make Love To You~ The O'Jays
✓ You Are My Starship~ Norman Connors
✓ Cybersex~ Next
✓ GreatestLove~ Musiq Soulchild
✓ TakeYouThere~ Musiq Soulchild
✓ TeachMe~ Musiq Soulchild
✓ Settle For My Love~ Musiq Soulchild
✓ Love~ Musiq Soulchild
✓ If You Love Me~ Mint Condition
✓ What Kind of Man Would I Be~ Mint Condition
✓ Butterflies~ Michael Jackson
✓ Human Nature~ Michael Jackson
✓ Liberian Girl~ Michael Jackson
✓ A Little Bit More ~ Melba Moore & Freddie Jackson
✓ Outside Your Door~ Me'Shell Ndegeocello
✓ For Lovers Only~ Maxwell
✓ Pretty Wings (uncut)~ Maxwell
✓ ...Til The Cops Come Knockin'~ Maxwell
✓ Submerge:Til We Become the Sun~ Maxwell
✓ Fistful Of Tears~ Maxwell
✓ Bad Habits~ Maxwell
✓ I Want You~ Marvin Gaye
✓ Distant Lover (Live)~ Marvin Gaye
✓ Love Won't Let Me Wait~ Major Harris
✓ Flex~ Mad Cobra
✓ If This World Were Mine~ Luther Vandross & Cheryl Lynn
✓ Here And Now~ Luther Vandross
✓ My Body~ LSG
✓ Door #1~ LSG
✓ You Can't Stop the Rain~ Loose Ends
✓ What You Are~ Lionel Richie
✓ It Takes A Fool~ Lenny Williams
✓ Goin' Thru Changes~ Ledisi
✓ In The Morning~ Ledisi
✓ April Love~ L.T.D.
✓ We Both Deserve Each Other's Love~ L.T.D.
✓ Love Ballad~ L.T.D.
✓ Beautiful Distraction~ Kenny Lattimore & Chante Moore
✓ Tonight~ Kem
✓ Say~ Kem
✓ How Deep Is Your Love~ Keith Sweat
✓ Love Changes~ Kashif with Meli'sa Morgan
✓ Until The End Of Time~ Justin Timberlake Feat. The Benjamin Wright Orchestra
✓ Show Me~ John Legend
✓ I Wanna Know~ Joe
✓ The Love Scene~ Joe
✓ More & More~ Joe
✓ All the Things (Your Man Won't Do)~ Joe
✓ Show Me~ Jill Scott
✓ The Way~ Jill Scott
✓ Wanna Be Loved~ Jill Scott
✓ Crown Royal~ Jill Scott
✓ Come See Me~ Jill Scott
✓ Whatever~ Jill Scott
✓ Let It Be ~ Jill Scott
✓ My Love~ Jill Scott
✓ Ain't Understanding Mellow~ Jerry Butler & Betty Everett
✓ Someday Is Tonight~ Janet Jackson
✓ Come Back to Me~ Janet Jackson
✓ Funny How Time Flies (When You're Having Fun)~ Janet Jackson
✓ Don't Say Goodnight (It's Time For Love) [Parts 1 & 2]~ The Isley Brothers
✓ Sensuality~ The Isley Bros.
✓ Always And Forever~ Heatwave
✓ Sara Smile~ Hall & Oates
✓ Careless Whisper ~ George Michael
✓ Going In Circles~ The Friends Of Distinction
✓ You Are My Lady~ Freddie Jackcon
✓ Tender Love~ Force M.D.'s
✓ Tears~ Force M.D.'s
✓ Here I Go Again~ Force M.D.'s
✓ Getting Late~ Floetry
✓ Imagination~ Floetry
✓ Lay Down~ Floetry
✓ Love's Holiday~ EWF
✓ 4 Leaf Clover~ Erykah Badu
✓ Next Lifetime~ Erykah Badu
✓ Otherside Of The Game~ Erykah Badu
✓ Femininity~ Eric Benet
✓ You're the Only One~ Eric Benét
✓ Pretty Baby~ Eric Benét
✓ I Wanna Be Loved~ Eric Benet
✓ Gloria~ Enchantment
✓ Waitin' On You~ En Vogue
✓ I'll Write A Song For You~ Earth Wind & Fire
✓ The Love We Had (Stays on My Mind)~ Dru Hill
✓ Beauty~ Dru Hill
✓ Where I Wanna Be~ Donnell Jones
✓ The Love We Had (Stays On My Mind)~ The Dells
✓ Stay In My Corner~ The Dells
✓ I Touched a Dream~ The Dells
✓ Breathless~ Corinne Bailey Rae
✓ Seasons Change~ Corinne Bailey Rae
✓ Enchantment~ Corinne Bailey Rae
✓ Love's Train~ Confunkshun
✓ Zoom (Long Version)~ The Commodores
✓ Sailing~ Christopher Cross
✓ Oh No~ Chico DeBarge
✓ How 'Bout Us~ Champaign
✓ Through The Fire~ Chaka Khan
✓ Summer Rain~ Carl Thomas
✓ Emotional~ Carl Thomas
✓ I Can't Tell You Why~ Brownstone
✓ Good Enough~ Brian McKnight, Carl Thomas, Joe, Tank & Tyrese
✓ What's My Name~ Brian McKnight
✓ Every Time You Go Away~ Brian McKnight
✓ This Must Be Heaven~ Brainstorm
✓ What You Won't Do For Love~ Bobby Caldwell
✓ Please Don't Go~ Boyz II Men
✓ Never Gonna Let You Go~ Blackstreet
✓ Love Serenade~ Barry White
✓ Cloudy~ Average White Band
✓ A Love of Your Own~ Average White Band
✓ Always~ Atlantic Starr
✓ I Cant Let Go~ Anthony Hamilton
✓ Put It On Paper~ Ann Nesby & Al Green
✓ Prototype~ Andre 3000
✓ Sunshine~ Alexander O'Neal
✓ Crying Overtime~ Alexander O'Neal
✓ Stay With Me (By The Sea)~ Al Green feat. John Legend
✓ Nite And Day~ Al B. Sure
✓ Gonna Love You Right (A Cappella Remix)~ After 7
✓ Baby I'm for Real (Natural High)~ After 7
✓ Ready or Not~ After 7
✓ Just Call My Name~ Alyson Williams
✓ Like You'll Never See Me Again~ Alicia Keys
✓ Stop The World~ Maxwell
✓ Confusion~ Zhané

30 Days of Erotic Truth #20: Feelin' Right Randy

Task: Tell a story of your most embarrassing sexual experience..

Wow... I have a couple of these I can tell, lol. I'll go with the most hilarious, at least to me...

This was the summer that my girls and I were fuckin' our way around the US Navy's Old Guard barracks at the Anacostia Naval Station. At this particular juncture I was messing around with a guy by the name of Vincent. He was a handsome sailor originally from either Mississippi or Georgia. A caramel brotha, with a Southern drawl that would melt butter. We had been dating for a few weeks, and this particular night was just like any other. He has sent a cab to pick me up from the projects and bring me to the base. This was pre-9/11. You know that shit won't fly now! Anyway, his room mate was on duty that night so it was just him and I. After eating dinner in his room, we got in bed and started making out. I remember we had the radio on. My favorite song at the time was 'Let's Chill' by Guy and it had just came on, so he was singing it to me. I think we may have had a little something to drink too, because I was feeling right randy as he was singing. I was straddling him and we were kissing in between verses. I moved to change positions so I could kiss his neck and ear, and lost my balance. I don't know how but I ended up standing on my head against the wall at the head of his bunk. We both cracked up laughing! It was a good thing I still had my underwear on too. Tiddies in my face would not have been as funny. Vincent helped me down and we laughed a little more, then we fucked til he had to get up for duty the next morning. I fell asleep in his bunk just as he was leaving. I woke up a little later to his room mate pulling the cover off me.

But that's another blog entirely....

30 Days of Erotic Truth: Oh You Spunky, Huh...?

Task: Bukkake... Your thoughts?

Boo-who??

Oh, ok... You mean THAT...

I don't really have any thoughts on it. If you like it, DO YOU. Personally, I don't need a cum shower from a bunch of random penises... And I don't want ONE guy skeetin' on my face. I'ma sit still and let 2-3 or MORE do it? Get da fuck outta here with dat bullshit, Slim...

I mean, really...

Protein scrub? No, thank you.

Semen facial? I'll pass.

Spunk mousse in my locs? Hell-to-da-naw, Bobby!

I'm willing to try lots of things. Bukkake isn't one of 'em. Honestly? that's some funny shit right there, Slim...

30 Days of Erotic Truth #18: With This Ring

Task: Tell a sexual triangle story





Oh wow… Which one do I tell? It's hard to decidebecause there has only been 2 people in my life that I never had to share withsomeone else. Every other man or woman that I have EVER dealt with, I had toshare with someone else. Every single one… except Sonny and George.



And George ended up sharing me.





George was older than me by about 15 years. I had only beendating the Hub for about 10 months when George and I met. We kicked it asfriends as first. He'd flirt when he saw me and I'd smile and play coy. Iwasn't trying to give him any play for real because I figured I had a goodthing going with the pre-Hub. Pre-hub had helped me get an apartment the summerbefore after only dating for a month, so I figured I owed him a little loyalty.Well Moms and I had decided to go visit my big sister in Omaha, and we werelooking at traveling on very short money. George gave me his bank card and toldme to use what I needed. At first I refused, thinking I couldn't take his moneylike that. I've never been the gold-digger type. George insisted. He didn'twant his friend traveling broke. So Mom and I had a nice time, and I didn'tspend too much of his money, lol.



Came back from Omaha, and started going through the motionswith pre-Hub and his supposedly ex-girlfriend. George was right there offeringthe shoulder I needed. I went to his apartment one day to help him clean it orsomething, and we ended up having sex. I will admit, for a much older guyGeorge had a huge dick and stamina for DAYS. That was the first time n years Iended up with rug burns on my knees AND my back! We fucked all over his room.He just had so much passion and intensity, and our chemistry was pitch perfect.He's a Gemini, how could we not? LOL Afterwards, I went home and feltlike crap. Pre-hub and I were supposed to be working things out. Why did I haveto go and sleep with George? I wasn't going to do it again.



Well, George started coming around the family more andPre-hub started carrying things like George wasn't a threat. A couple of timeswhen George was at the house, Pre-hub straight snubbed him. I didn't like hisattitude, given the fact that George was being such a good friend to not onlyme but my whole family. George loved my kids and my jackwagon sister's kids. Wewould take them to the movies, always his treat, or to the park or just hangout and have fun with them all. Jackwagon saw George as her own personal cashcow and started milking him for money almost from the word go. She even madehim one of her kids' god-father. George took the role seriously, all the whiletrying to get me to be his lady. We'd had sex a few more times, and George wastaking good care of me. Our favorite ting to do was shower together. Georgewould wash me from head to toe. All I had to do was stand there and let him.Then he'd dry me off and we'd fuck all over again. A few times it got sointense I ended up with friction burns on my cooch, but he would lovingly tendto those too. Pre-hub was still denying how things were going with his ex, so Ifinally decided to not hide things between George and I any more. If Pre-Hubwanted to play me, fine. I'd DO me.



Then things took a bad turn. I'd gotten pregnant by Pre-Hubagain. At first he was excited, but then he decided that it wasn't a good ideafor us to have a baby right then. After about a week of convincing I agreed toend the pregnancy. The day after I had the abortion, Pre-Hub broke up with me. Iwas no more good, and wanted to curl up and die. How could he hurt me likethat? I needed to get away from everyone for a while, so I took my girlsand went to George's apartment. He had given me a set of keys, and I knew hewas out of town. No one knew where I was, and I was refusing to answer mypager. Somebody called George and he panicked. He came back in town and foundus asleep in his apartment. After telling him what had happened, he asked me tomarry him. I didn't know what to say or do. I was caught in the middle.



I went back and forth between Pre-Hub and George for a longtime after that. George finally decided he'd had enough when I became pregnantwith my youngest daughter. We were still friends, and he came to love her too,but he couldn't deal with me being on the fence. He eventually moved back toFlorida. Pre-hub and I got married, and had our son. 12 years later, theex-girlfriend is still in the picture, and I've only seen George once sincethen. Needless to say the Hub was on the verge of fighting the day Georgeshowed up at our house. I sometimes still wonder about him. I even wear thering he gave me.